Fun Rhyme Birthday Greetings for Lolo/Daddy Max

Happy happy birthday to you Lolo/Daddy MAX…
Lolo/Daddy MAX indeed is still suave and as smooth as WAX;
At age NINETY-NINE, he looks as though he’s just SIXTY-NINE – –
Still, Lolo/Daddy MAX can un-assisted, do unto my Law Office stairs a quick CLIMB;
He could even dance the TWERK which is famous among lovely girls who’ve sipped WINE!

Among the most descriptive adjective that is ascribable unto LOLO/DAD MAX, as a FOREBEAR…
The term DISCPLINARIAN is the most that attaches to LOLO/DAD MAX, and it’s so CLEAR;
The thick-leather thong belting episode (after I got caught street-gambling when I was 10) that made me avoid MAHJONG- –
Will always be okey with me as long as I’ll receive some part of the TONG;
And I’m sure (next year) that LOLO/DAD MAX’s 100th birthday will be most astounding, accompanied by the shrilling sound of a GONG!

I still vividly remember the Rocky Marciano-style of a punch that hit my stomach, my BELLY…
Perhaps, that’s the reason why I can make 100 sit-ups, like PACMAN, MANNY;
And the kneeling punishments that I’d usually GET- –
Made me also stronger, with SQUAT JUMPS that’s hard to FORGET;
For it has become the usual sanction when I was still a toddler and a growing BAGET!

But the most memorable teaching that I distinctly REMEMBER…
Was how to cook sotanghon soup using as “pang-gatong” a heap of CHARCOAL EMBER;
‘Twas at a time in the late ‘50s when there was some sort of a FLU EPIDEMIC – –
Only I and LOLO/DAD MAX, were not infected, ‘twas a record that’s kinda EPIC;
But the SOTANGHON SOUP, tasted so SALTY, as the bottle of PATIS sort of PANICKED!

At the former structure of our house at 19th AVENUE…
It was pure ground-earth flooring with lots of “banig”, and the SOTANGHON SOUP also registered lots of SPEW;
Lola/Mommy NORMA was down; YAM, JING, SON and BERT were all CALM – –
And our maid CLARITA was shivering cold as though a wiggling CLAM;
They all spewed the first round of the SALTY SOUP and RICE, so we had to water down the SOUP, scooping water from the DRUM!

And the seasonal mini-gladiatorial COMBAT was truly HORRIFYING and EXCITING…
When the PIG PEN needs to be cleansed and hosed, after piglets are given birth by the “INAHIN”;
LOLO/DAD MAX would look like a GLADIATOR facing the “INAHIN” in some kind of hand-to-mouth FIGHTING – –
Like a CROCODILE, the “INAHIN” will open its mouth with some “PANGIL” and would make its mouth SNAP, angling LOLO/DAD MAX’s DING-A-LING!

And LOLO/DAD MAX will always win the seeming GLADIATORIAL COMBAT in the END…
With our chickens roosting inside their PEN hooting with excitement, and with their crowing salutes they’d SEND;
And LOLO/DAD MAX will receive a nod and a pat of adulation among our renters and BOARDERS in their tittle-tattle SPREE- –
With shower of leaves as though lots of confetti from the nearby “aratiles” TREE;
And then and there, the “INAHING BABOY” will snort and sort of BRAY
and WHINNY!

And I think this ferocious type (so protective of its litters and piglets) of a PIG…
Will always be VANQUISHED, with a bamboo pole or perhaps a TWIG;
As in every birthday of our suave and dandy LOLO/DAD MAX – –
A roasted pig aka LECHON, will be prepared with its skin so oily as though WAXED;
Some kind of “karma” for the pigs’ tribe’s past fierce ATTACKS!

HAPPY, HAPPY BIRTHDAY LOLO/DADDY MAX!